College Life
by Texan Red Rose
Summary: Join Jazz Fenton as she greets the chaos of a typical Saturday morning. Contains copious alcohol consumption and multiple characters from shows across Cartoon Network, Nickelodeon, Disney, and MTV.


Author's note: Born of a challenge made by Leolupin on the KP Slash Haven boards about college roommates: Kim Possible and Gwen Tennyson. I don't know much of college or Ben 10 but I wrote up this lil scene. It made me chuckle. Disclaimer at the bottom to prevent spoilers. Also, please note that I do _not_ promote underage or excessive alcohol consumption, but I _do_ advocate having sober, responsible people present to make sure no one goes overboard. There, PSA over.

-College Life-

Jazz Fenton sighed as she opened the door to the off campus apartment she shared with three- or more- roommates. The night before, in typical Friday fashion, had been a blur of activity, mostly centered around the football game she was required to attend and the after parties that demanded her presence- being on the university's student staffed watch program came with its responsibilities. One of which being that she couldn't actually participate in any of the alcohol induced festivities, just watch to make sure no one got too in over their head. Luckily the next week- the Homecoming game- was her off week, with one of her two roommates also part of the program taking up the position.

As the redhead closed the door, she couldn't help but roll her eyes at the scene before her. All over the living rooms, people were passed out in various states of undress. The usual suspects were present. Her brother, Danny, and his girlfriend, Sam Manson, were curled up on the comfy recliner, with 'BACK OFF HE'S MINE' written across Danny's chest in Sam's purple lipstick. His frosted hair meant he'd gone ghost at some point- probably to help in acquiring more alcohol- and hadn't reverted yet. Their friend, Tucker Foley, was nearby, somehow propped up against the wall with his feet over his head and a bottle of Code Red Mountain Dew craddled to his chest, a strangely happy smile on his lips. On the loveseat was Jenny Wakeman who, as a robot, couldn't actually get drunk but often acted as intoxicated as her human classmates and crashed at the apartment to avoid her own roommates, Susan and Mary Test- genius twin sisters whose obsession with deconstructing their roommate bordered on unhealthy. Her best friend, Brad Carbunkle, was precariously balanced on the loveseat's edge, with his t-shirt wrapped around his head like a turbin and a mustache drawn in sharpie gracing his upper lip. On the floor were three brunette boys, the little brothers of two of her roommates. The one in the middle, his green jacket fastened around his neck like a cape, was Gwen's brother, Ben Tennyson, while the other two were Kim's twin brothers, Jim and Tim Possible. Having irksome younger brothers and being natural redheads brought the three together quickly but, as they were all relatively competitive and type A personalities, there was friction every now and again. Not as much as with their fourth roommate, though, while their fifth on-again, off-again roommate, currently passed out on the couch completely topless, caused none at all and often diffused situations.

"I thought we agreed no more underage drinking in the apartment?" Jazz called out, heading into the dining nook where she knew her third roommate would be. She was right; sitting at the table, with their green teas still steaming, was Daria Morgendorffer, a pad and pencil set before her, with her best friend, Jane Lane, eagerly working on what looked to be a sketch of the mayhem in the living room.

"We did; however, majority rules in a democracy, and there's more of them than us," Daria calmly explained, jotting down something on her pad. "Besides, I have a research paper on animal behavior due on Monday and the younger brothers of this household are better subjects than anything you can find in a zoo."

"Plus, I need something to submit to the paper's 'Student Life' section," Jane chimed in, nodding her head towards the living room. "This place is like a stationary, living muse."

"Glad to be of service," Jazz shook her head, with a small smile on her lips. In truth, though she didn't like the idea of Danny drinking at all, it was better that he do it where she at least had people watching him. The roommates were already well aware of what drunken ghost powers could do and usually had their personal enforcer to keep him in check. "Where's-"

"In Kim's bedroom, of course," Daria offered one of her rare smiles. "After Shego broke out the tequila, there was no stopping Miss Pom Pom from ending the night early."

"And by 'early', we mean they were still at it when we knocked out at five," Jane supplied, studying her work. "They should be waking up soon though; might as well get some food ready."

"And that task is delegated to me because...?" Jazz quirked a brow. Daria and Jane just stared at her a moment before the redhead rolled her eyes. "Okay, fine. What- nevermind, I know what you two want."

"I said it once, I will say it again: there is no moment in life that can't be improved with pizza," Daria nodded, then went back to writing her notes while Jane turned her attention to her sketch.

"I'm checking with the others, anyway. Majority rules, ya know," Jazz turned, heading into the kitchen area to grab the apartment phone. Leaning against the counter, peering out through a cut out in the wall to the living room, Jazz called out to her fifth roommate. "Hey, Chick Who Lives On The Couch, you hungry?"

Without moving any other portion of her body, the woman's left arm shot up, her hand making a thumbs up sign.

"What do you want?"

Her index and middle fingers joined the thumb, indicating the number three.

"Damnit, alright, I'll call for pizza," Jazz sighed, turning back to the fridge to grab the number. As she did so, Shego entered the kitchen from the bedroom area of the apartment.

"Are you calling for pizza again?" the green tinted woman mumbled, shuffling past Jazz to make a pot of coffee. Though she didn't live there, Shego had been over to spend time with her girlfriend enough to know where everything was. Jazz nodded absently, then noticed Shego's current state of undress.

"Shego, you know the house rules, at least a bikini while the sun's up," Jazz frowned at the super powered Global Justice agent's groan.

"It's too damn early to remember where my clothes are and, damnit, Chick Who Lives On The Couch is always topless!" Through the cut out, she could see a fist suddenly appear before offering her the middle finger. Shego rolled her eyes and sighed. "Yeah yeah, house rule sixteen, no house rules apply to Chick Who Lives On The Couch. You're a lucky bitch."

"Who's a lucky bitch?" Sam grumbled, having woken up when she heard the coffee machine kick on. Blinking a few times, she glanced Shego up and down before speaking. "Ya know, always thought your pubic hair would be green for some reason."

"Oh the hangover comments; finer wisdom cannot be found," Daria drawled from the dining nook.

"Shego, clothes, now!" Jazz hissed as the phone began to dial.

"Wha' 'bout Shego?" Kim stumbled in, still heavily hungover, wearing just a bluejean jacket and underwear. Even in her blurry eyed state, the part time heroine recognized the issue and quickly attempted to solve it. "Shego, g' back t'tha room."

"Damnit, Pumpkin, I don't wanna put my clothes back on just yet!" Shego reluctantly moved, not wishing to start a fight so early in the morning.

"Didn't say anythin' 'bout puttin' clothes back on," Kim gave a lecherous grin before kissing her girlfriend and giving the older woman a playful swat on her rear to usher her back to the bedroom. Poking her head in the living room, Kim returned while trying to blink her way back into focus. "Too ma'y people in here."

"Is Gwen here too? I didn't see her in the living room," Jazz drummed her fingers along the counter, nodding her head to the beat of the hold music.

"Gwen cut out around midnight, somethin' 'bout it bein' her lucky night," Ben called from the living room, then groaned. "Ow, my head!"

"Dude, when did you get that bruise?" One voice grumbled, his twin answering.

"Probably the same time you did."

"Ah, the house of the living dead awakens," Daria continued making her notes. Jane paused, midstroke.

"Did I bring my zombie repellant?"

"Jane, you don't go anywhere without your charm."

"Has anyone seen my shirt?"

"It's around your head, Brad. Careful not to-" a loud thump resounded through the apartment. "Saw that comin'."

"Oh, shut up you! Lucky robots, no hangovers," Brad continued to mumble incoherently before slipping back asleep.

"Is he still alive?" Sam raised a brow while pouring herself some coffee. Kim was busy fixing Shego's cup, trying to do so quickly so she could return to her room.

"Yeah, everyone's gonna be fine, I already ran a scan," Jenny stretched out on the loveseat. Ben raised his head enough to take note of where she was, then groaned.

"Thank God we have a breathilizer for a friend. Has the carpet always been this color?"

"I don't know why you keep drinking, Ben. You obviously can't hold your liquor to save your life," Jazz turned her attention from whatever response might be directed at her to the voice at the other end of the line. "Hey Ted... yeah, the usual..."

"AH! LIPSTICK!" Danny suddenly yelled, phasing through the chair as he regained semi-consciousness and getting stuck halfway through the furniture piece. Almost instantly, the three brothers on the floor barked about him being too loud, which woke up Brad and Tucker and added to the noise. Sam called out for them all to shut up while Jazz walked into the back of the apartment to continue placing their order. From the dining nook, Jane started timing the impromptu hangover argument- a standard facet of Saturday mornings- while Daria sipped her green tea.

All noise suddenly halted when Chick Who Lives On The Couch shifted, her left hand rising again to make a quick series of gesticulations, ending with a wave and a snap. The hungover occupants of the apartment nodded solemly.

"Man, she's quiet, but when she does speak, she's _deep_," Tucker rolled himself away from the wall to settle into a more comfortable sleeping position, his Mountain Dew still hugged to his chest. Everyone else- including Daria and Jane- nodded while quietly rearranging themselves. Jazz came back into the kitchen to replace the phone with a triumphant smile. Noticing the quiet, she poked her head into the dining nook.

"Forty-three seconds. She cut it short this morning," Jane offered with a shrug.

Jazz nodded, a little disappointed she'd missed the speech. "Should we call Gwen and see when she's coming back?"

"Nah, knowing her luck, she'll show up with the pizza guy and somehow get it for free," Daria offered while raising a brow. "Speaking of missing people, has anyone seen Ember?"

"Ember?" Jazz' brows furrowed, then rose in alarm. "Wait, you don't mean-"

"Yeah, she and Danny did some talking and worked out a deal. She's over on Greek Row turning the sororities into rock bands," Sam offered nonchalantly, sipping her coffee.

"She's getting the Kappas back for trying to change the school's alma mater to their barely altered 'Don'cha Wish Your College Was Hot Like Us'?" Jazz asked, still a bit shocked. Sam shook her head.

"Something to do with their new chair, head member thingie being some chick Kim knew from high school. Bonnie Stoneseller or something like that."

"Oh," Jazz shrugged. "Well, Kim's the resident good girl, so I guess she knows what she's doing."

Just then, a screaming moan resounded through the apartment: "_Oh Kimmie!_"

Daria looked at Jazz. "What's your definition of 'good', exactly?"

-end-

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Jazz Fenton, Danny Fenton, Sam Manson, Tucker Foley, and Ember- from Nickelodeon's _Danny Phantom_-, Jenny Wakeman and Brad Carbunkle- from Nickelodeon's _My Life as a Teenage Robot_-, Susan and Mary Test- from Cartoon Network's _Johnny Test_-, Ben and Gwen Tennyson- from Cartoon Network's _Ben 10_-, Tim Possible, Jim Possible, Kim Possible, and Shego- from Disney's _Kim Possible_-, Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane- from MTV's _Daria_-, or the concept behind Chick Who Lives On The Couch who is based on the character Guy On The Couch- from the movie _Half Baked_.

Long disclaimer...


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